Introducing Sexual Nature to Children: Understanding Gender Differences

Sexual nature needs to be introduced and emphasised to children as early as possible. Before introducing sexual nature to children, we need to understand what it means.

What is sex?

Sex is biological differences between males and females, such as the genitalia and genetic differences. Male is identified as human with penis and produce sperm, while female is identified as a sex that can bear offspring or produce eggs, distinguished biologically by the production of gametes (ova) which can be fertilised by male gametes. Sex is what we are born with, which is attached to us biologically.

What is gender?

Gender is more to individual concepts of themselves, which may refer to the role of a male or female in society. The term is also used more broadly to denote a range of identities that do not correspond to established ideas of sex (male and female).

Is sex and gender the same?

No. Sex is biological while gender is more cultural and sociological.

Why do we need to introduce the nature of sexuality to children?

  • Children understand their identity as a male or female
  • To understand the difference between male and female
  • Helps children to understand their private areas
  • To understand the difference between male and female in terms of each role within the society

When is the best time to introduce sexuality nature to children?

According to Sigmund Freud, the best time to introduce sexual nature to children is:

  1. Phallic stage, when they are interested in their private areas that may range from  2 to 6 years old.  
  2. Genital phase, when the sex drive emerged and developed. It may starts as early as 12 years old onwards.

How to introduce children to gender based on their nature of sexuality?

  1. Strengthen the gender identity based on their nature of sexuality
  2. Learn about grace and courtesy
  3. Introduce the concept "aurat".
  4. Share the chores in the house based on child's gender.

Personal view on this topic

Every human lives on this planet carrying certain mission. In Al-Qur'an, it is mentioned that human is a caliph, or the successor of God. It means that every human is assigned to be the caretaker of the earth.

The role of parents, in my opinion, is to bring out the kids to be the best version of caliph. One of, and the very basic way to achieve this is by planting the concept of sexual nature to children, so that they have a clear and strong concept of themselves.